Becca Ryskalczyk | Heartbreaking Bravery

March 9, 2017

2016: A Year’s Worth of Memories (Katie Preston)

Heartbreaking Bravery recently went offline but all facets of the site are back to being fully operational. Apologies for any inconveniences. All posts that were slated to run during that brief hiatus will appear with this note.

Katie Preston’s band, Pleistocene, has been consistently covered over the course of this site’s history (and were an important part of the A Step Forward compilation) so it’s good to have her be a part of this edition of A Year’s Worth of Memories. Better still, Preston turns her lens on a coterie of friends that have played a significant role in this site’s coverage, making her first entry into the series a little bit like a family affair. In recalling a weekend that had just occurred, Preston conjures up a lifetime’s worth of memories and gets to the root of what makes some things so meaningful. Buckle up and take it for a spin.

This is taken pretty much straight out of my diary, which is why it’s told like it just happened, but really it happened back in April, even though it still stands out vividly to me.

There are good days and bad days. I sometimes go long periods of time where it feels like my day job takes up everything I’ve got. There are slumps and then there are moments of solid gold that kind of even it all out. This past weekend was more of a streak than a moment. My time was strictly spent doing the things that make me happy. We (Pleistocene) had a show at the Sanc, Dylan from Skirt’s place. If you’re lost at this point in the story, you are probably not from Rochester, NY but stick with me. There were about seventy youths there. By youths I mean adults who like seeing bands in basements.

Besides us, Green Dreams, Total Yuppies, and Potty Mouth played. We had a girl pit during Potty Mouth’s set. It felt good to bounce off each other, occasionally falling (lovingly) into the bassist, who stood a foot away from me on the same brown shag carpet. I took pictures of Abby after the show with her guitar for my zine. We got home late and left for NYC early Saturday morning. I worked on my zine on the way there, cutting out pictures of the people I’d seen play over the course of the month with their instruments into heart shapes. Erick made us stop for Arby’s twice. When we got to Brooklyn I got to meet my best friend’s new guy. Being long distance best friends, any new development in her life feels especially exciting, after only hearing stories about him for months.

Becca and I used to be in a band together in college called Paul’s Grandfather. When I lived in Brooklyn, I lived with Becca and worked at Crif Dogs with her. We used to be pretty much inseparable. My moving back to Rochester has been hard in that way. Her and I picked up where things left off by going out for piña coladas at Old Stanley’s with the rest of Pleistocene, hopping between there and the bodega next door for tacos before heading over to the show.

The venue was probably the shittiest I’ve ever played. No offense, Aviv. They’ve since changed locations and I’m sure it’s better now. But tonight Jim and the rest of the Painted Zeros were there and tons of other friends from past-lives who showed up from out of the woodwork. Slight played first. I got on Erick’s shoulders with a lighter, which got a couple laughs from the nine audience members. Then Sonny Baker’s band played, triggering old memories of Buffalo, NY.

A crowd started to fill in at this point. We had a fun set. I slid on my knees and scraped them up pretty good. Then Becca played. Her band, Bethlehem Steel was going through a line-up change so she played solo. She mesmerized us all, like always. We all got pretty drunk after. Palled around with Katie Lau over many Jager shots and ended up back at Old Stanley’s for more piña coladas and pinball. That night at Becca’s apartment we made the biggest, most disgusting plate of loaded nachos that was almost too gross to eat but that didn’t stop us from all picking at it for breakfast the next morning.

We left early Sunday so I could make it to rehearsal. It was my first time singing with both Mikaela Davis and Cammy Enaharo at the same time. Cammy, of course is in Pleistocene but this is a whole new venture. We were recording harmonies for our friend Ben’s album. Our voices surprised me when they first came together – like a shiver down the spine, except more like an electrocution. We decided that we should start a band and that band would be called the Vinaigrettes. There you have it, a weekend for the highlight reel for sure. Now I’m back to the working week, although that hardly seems so bad after a three day golden streak.

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October 3, 2016

HB1000: A Step Forward (Compilation)

When I started Heartbreaking Bravery nearly three years ago, I had no intention of pursuing it as a legitimate venture. Now, 1,000 posts, 50,000+ links, and countless words later, the site’s come to be the type of platform I’ve always loved seeing in the world. I could attempt to wax poetic on the nature of personal discovery and growth that running this place has afforded me but Heartbreaking Bravery was never about a single person, it’s always functioned best as a communal entity.

The ideas that formed the basic structure of Heartbreaking Bravery all came from artists producing exceptional work with little recognition. Repeatedly watching that transaction occur proved too disheartening. Whether it was the earliest years of Tenement, the later years of Good Grief, or virtually the entire run of Sleeping in the Aviary, there were always ceaselessly talented artists surrounding me that only ever seemed to receive the slightest of nods.

Heartbreaking Bravery originally aimed — and continues to aim — to provide a more level playing field to emerging artists, without reducing their worth to financial opportunity. Heartbreaking Bravery continues to value the community and intimacy that informs the DIY music world. Heartbreaking Bravery will continue to use the platform it’s been granted to elevate the idea of greater equality.

It’s in that spirit that I’m honored to present A Step Forward, a two-volume compilation spanning 100 tracks that exclusively features artists who are connected to this site’s history. Whether that was through a long history of collaboration or something as small as a twitter follow, the impact was not lost or left unappreciated. There’s a heavy emphasis on artists residing in the cities and states Heartbreaking Bravery has called home (Stevens Point, WI and Brooklyn, NY) and a small selection of songs that were premiered on this site.

100% of the proceeds of A Step Forward will be going to Rape Victim Advocates, a non-profit Chicago-based organization that’s doing vital (and, sadly, necessary) work for survivors of sexual assault. Read more about the organization here. It’s my sincerest hope that every publication that has the privilege of visibility manages to find ways to use any of their influence for productive good and to affect positive change. Please consider donating what you can to a meaningful cause.

Finally, I wanted to express gratitude to all of the artists (and any of their teams) involved — including the inimitable Phil McAndrew, who turned in the extraordinary album art — and all of the people that have allowed, even willed, this site to the point it’s at today. It likely would have disappeared without that support and I owe those people a debt of gratitude that could never be truly repaid. A special thanks to Fred Thomas, whose “What Changes When The Costumes Come Off” was written with the specifics of A Step Forward in mind.

Enjoy the compilation, support independent art, and join me, this site, these artists, and this cause in taking A Step Forward.

Tracklist below.

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A Step Forward: Vol. 1*

1. Vacation – Caked Joy Rag (Demo)
2. Mike Krol – Neighborhood Watch (Demo)
3. Dead Stars – So Strange (Demo)
4. Mo Troper – After the Movies (Demo)
5. Fern Mayo – The Sweets (Demo)
6. Hater – Like Hours (Demo)
7. Sharkmuffin – Only Mondays (Demo)
8. Fits – Ice Cream On A Nice Day (Demo)
9. Missy – Patience (Demo)
10. Kodakrome – Skeletons (Demo)
11. Slight – Run (Demo)
12. Long Neck – Goldfinch (Demo)
13. Phyllis Ophelia – Probably Not (Demo)
14. Lever – Cure (Demo)
15. Puppy Problems – Destroyer (Demo)
16. Battle Ave. – Black Jeans (Demo)
17. Yours Are The Only Ears – Alone Bear (Demo)
18. Attendant – Some Other Language (Demo)
19. MKSEARCH – Little Song (Demo)
20. Sulky Boy – Birches (Demo)
21. Heavy Looks – Those Guys (Demo)
22. darn it. – (again) pt. II
23. Phooey! – On an On
24. Arm Candy – Big Clunker
25. DTCV – Le Vampire
26. Clearance – The Queen of Eyes
27. Leggy – I’m Gonna Destroy That Boy
28. Big Air – Hit Me in the Mouth
29. Terry Malts – Look (At the Mess That We’re In)
30. Ubetcha – Musician
31. Two Inch Astonaut – Suckers Share
32. Whelpwisher – Bucket for the Sky
33. Petite League – Magic Johnson
34. The Meltaways (ft. Kate M) – Wrong Words
35. Calumet – Indian Summer
36. Mulligrub – Little Fist
37. Ben Seretan – Stay In Touch
38. Mumblr – Friendship Stew
39. Human People – Useless Things
40. Bethlehem Steel – Florida Two
41. Painted Zeros – Sweet Briar Rose
42. Spit – Paul Westerberg
43. Crusher – Running
44. Pupppy – Stand By Me
45. Aberdeen – Once You Fall In Love
46. Tica Douglas – Enough
47. Peaer – Multiverse
48. The Weasel, Marten Fisher – What Is Love
49. Young Jesus – Mirroring
50. Space Mountain – Earthrise

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A Step Forward: Vol. II*

1. Bellows – Bank Checks
2. Cave Curse – Arcadia
3. Fred Thomas – What Changes When the Costumes Come Off
4. Apollo Vermouth – He Sees You, He Loves You
5. Green Dreams – Psychic Woes (Alternate Mix)
6. Lost Boy ? – Have You Seen My Brain (Space Cat Sessions)
7. Mikaela Davis – Pure Divine Love (Early Mix)
8. Nano Kino – Recovery (Early Mix)
9. Trophy Dad – Addison (Early Mix)
10. Alanna McArdle – Less Than (Early Mix)
11. VVHILE – Don’t Belong (Live)
12. Liam Betson – Mispronounced (Live)
13. BAG-DAD – Bruv (Live)
14. Slothrust – Keg Party (Live)
15. The Nudes – Nowhere to Be
16. Sat. Nite Duets – Cemetery Steve
17. Slanted – Fake Party
18. Patio – Gold
19. Greys – No Star
20. No Hoax – Date With Death
21. Dirty Dishes – Red Roulette
22. Yeesh – On Some Dirt
23. Pile – Cut From First Other Tape
24. Even Hand – Nightsmoke the Fuss
25. PURPLE 7 – Wise Up
26. Bad Wig – Machinehead
27. Mary Lynn – Space
28. Pleistocene – CMJ Compilation 1996
29. Color TV – Anybody’s Girl
30. Jacky Boy – Bad
31. Trust Fund – Would That Be An Adventure?
32. Good Grief – City People
33. Adir L.C. – Hangover
34. Milk Crimes – H8RZ
35. À La Mode – Total Doom
36. Inside Voices – Nomad: Begin
37. Doe – Corin
38. Kindling – Became
39. Bueno – Blown Out
40. Horse Teeth – Dark & Gloomy
41. Ron Gallo – Put the Kids to Bed
42. Sun’s Out Bummed Out – Cut All My Hair
43. Eric Slick – The Dirge
44. Fruit & Flowers – Turqoise
45. Shilpa Ray – Hymn
46. Jack – Sister System
47. Strange Ranger – Whatever You Say
48. Johanna Warren – A Bird in the Crocodile’s Mouth
49. Oceanator – Nowhere Nothing
50. Fresh Snow – Eat Me In St. Louis (Bryan W. Bray – Eaten by the Cetacean Mix)

Vol. I

Tracks 1-21: Demos
Tracks 22-50: New Songs

Vol. II

Tracks 1-4: New Songs (cont’d)
Tracks 5-14: Alternate Mixes and Live Songs
Tracks 15-49: Old Favorites
Track 50: Remix

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December 26, 2015

2015: A Visual Retrospective, Vol. 4

Car Seat Headrest

Throughout the course of 2015 I’ve been fortunate enough to attend upwards of 100 shows, festivals big and small, and spend approximately half a year living in a city that hosted a mind-boggling amount of quality shows on a nightly basis. To that end, it’s probably unsurprising that I wound up taking over 10,000 photos this year alone. Over the course of the next few days, this site will be running seven volumes of the shots that stood out as personal favorites, whether that was due to their composition, sentimental attachment, or an intangible emotional or intellectual response. It’s been an honor to be able to take even the smallest part in the ongoing sagas of the artists in the photographs below and an additional thanks is due to the venues that allowed me to shoot (as well as the people who encouraged me to keep shooting).

Enjoy the gallery.

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